Finding Reynard
2 min readNov 29, 2021

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Hmm any other conspiracy theories? I do love a great conspiracy theory but this one needs a few more juicy details.

How about a white right wing mad scientist hypnotizes Chelsea Clinton to send a cryptic tweet a week before the assassination. This tweet makes everyone scratch their heads in bemusement until the assassination when everyone suddenly comes to conclusion that it was a secret code signal to the assassin to act swiftly and without mercy.

Let's call the killer ....Steve, no wait lets call him Cabal. Of course this planted tweet by Chelsea is crafted to rile up those stupid right wing deplorables. She will claim her account has been hacked which will only entrench the viewpoints of those on the left and right.

Other subtle clues are laid to point that finger at BLM, like a BLM flag wrapped around Kyles body or graffiti that spells BLM backwards - MLB. Of course the MLB tag will confuse some of us into thinking that there is a conspiracy brewing among baseball fans to take over the country and destroy democracy.

To add a bit more flare we can have Kyle beaten to death with a skateboard. Everyone knows a skateboard is Antifa's weapon of choice and also ecologically correct. What other weapon can combat climate change by also being used as a human powered method of transportation?

This skateboard fact will fuel rampant speculation that the assassination was actually ordered by a fascist left wing environmental group calling themselves the United Group to Comeback Crazy Deplorables Who Live Everywhere and Want to Destroy Us All. or GCCDWLEWDUA.

The country will devolve into anarchy and the lizard people who are actually running everything will be laughing at all of us as they plot our final downfall

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Finding Reynard
Finding Reynard

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